Warning: call_user_func_array() expects parameter 1 to be a valid callback, class 'collapsArch' does not have a method 'enqueue_scripts' in /Library/WebServer/Documents/pyslent/blog/wp-includes/class-wp-hook.php on line 287

Archive for December, 2016

Another Night Before

December 24th, 2016, 9:50pm by Jake

Twas the night before Christmas, and on our website
We had an absence of posting, no comments were in sight
WordPress is running Pyslent with due care
We may seldom write, but we still come & stare

Seven children were nestled, all snug in their beds
While visions of gadgets danced in dads’ heads
The Pats kept on winning, the Raiders a whole bunch
The Niners go for two, they took the Rams lunch

Out on the internet arose such a clatter
I sprang from the couch to see what was the matter
Grabbed my iPad Air, still working just fine
All the Apple gadgets, aging like fine wine

The internet was crazy, I’d never seen such a flurry
But I must be quick, I must be in a hurry
Then I just saw him, almost did not catch it.
It’s Rotiveo– the patron saint of gadgets!

Rotiveo wore Mobile Pants, size extra tall
And his clothes were vibrating, must be a phone call
Brought a load of gadgets, and even a game
And he whistled, and shouted and called sites by name

“Now Netflix! Now Target! And Amazon too!
To Nordstrom’s! To Costco! To Fandango too!”
All over the web, he searched high and searched low
To find all the stuff, now it’s ready to go!

All across the internet, Rotiveo he flew
A storm of traffic he did see in his rear view
He found the best deals, on the very best gear
It’s so cutting edge, it will still be good next year.

The net’s overflowing with really good stuff
Getting it to work might be kind of tough
With all sorts of cords and fifty kinds of plugs
(For us early adopters, we’re used to the bugs)

Rotiveo’s got the stuff to make us all gloat,
No Cable, Blackberry, nor ‘Galaxy Note
Instead it’s Apple’s Watch and their brand new laptop,
Pixels, Chromebooks, GoPros that never ever stop!

Joanie and Mike remember the warm summer past
Adam and Emma will be opening presents soon, and fast!
Kelvin and Serena live in Apple’s developing shadow
Lucas getting big quicker, it’s just grow grow grow

Jake and Jen start Hanukah on this very night,
Never been so happy to start the festival of light.
In years past it had been two and now three,
Rounding out the crew is the wonderful JV

How could Lucas be nine and Brandon … eleven?
They’ll still love their presents, all over again
Tiffany, Evan, Adam & Emma know its grand
Too many toys for fourteen big & little hands.

Happy in doggie heaven, looking down with such glee
There is Montana, merrily running free
She still sleeps and when she does she still dreams
Mostly of eating, people food I believe

Rotiveo sprang to Roomba (hacked years before)
And away they went, after cleaning the floor
But I heard him exclaim, ‘ere he drove out of sight,
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!”

Be careful out there Derrick!

December 15th, 2016, 2:23pm by Jake

Mountain lions at your doorstep.

More on the story,



Copyright © 2022 The Board. All Rights Reserved.
No computers were harmed in the 1.026 seconds it took to produce this page.

Designed/Developed by Lloyd Armbrust & hot, fresh, coffee.