Archive for December, 2012

The Night Before Pyslentmas

December 24th, 2012, 6:30pm by Jake

Twas the night before Christmas, and on our website
All had stopped posting, and comments were light
WordPress still running Pyslent with due care
Even if it’s slow, we still check in here

Five children were nestled, all snug in their beds
While visions of gadgets danced in dads’ heads
The Pats comeback worked, while the Niners fell way short
Blake Griffin and Chris Paul now rule the court

Out on the internet arose such a clatter
I sprang from the couch to see what was the matter
Grabbed my MacBook Air, no way it’s a fad?
Checked Twitter & email, this Mac’s stuff not bad

The internet was crazy, I’d never seen such a flurry
But I must be quick, I must be in a hurry
Then I just saw him, almost did not catch it.
It’s Rotiveo– the patron saint of gadgets!

Rotiveo wore Mobile Pants, size extra tall
And his clothes were vibrating, must be a phone call
Brought a load of gadgets, and even a game
And he whistled, and shouted and called sites by name

“Now Groupon! Now Apple! Now Target and Best Buy!
To Starbucks! To Costco! To Amazon and Fry’s”
All over the web, he searched high and searched low
To find all the stuff, now it’s ready to go!

All across the internet, Rotiveo he flew
A storm of traffic he did see in his rear view
He found the best deals, on the very best gear
It’s so cutting edge, it will still be good next year.

The net’s overflowing with really good stuff
Getting it to work might be kind of tough
With all sorts of cords and fifty kinds of plugs
(For us early adopters, we’re used to the bugs)

Rotiveo’s got just the right thing for us all
No Veer, Symbian, nor ‘lectronic pinball
Instead it’s the new Windows 8 and iPads galore,
Prime lenses, Wii U, Nexuses and more!

Giant TVs, they are perfect for games
Phones from Samsung, Apple, and a bunch of no-names
With the right kind of gear and a well-trained eye,
You’ll soon take great photos, and that ain’t no lie

The Dimiccos, spending another Christmas together
There’ll be much joy on a run, just ignore at the weather
To Kelvin, Serena, Montana & Lucas
Happily running all around, don’t fall on your tucus.

Jake and Olivia off to Tucson,
New people to meet, there will be lots of fun in the sun
Derrick, Emily, Brandon & Tiffany
Finally settled down, a permanent home for the family

Lucas’ sixth & Brandon’s eight Christmas Eve
Montana always dreaming, of food I believe
Tiffany, Adam & Emma now know that Christmas is grand
Too many toys to hold in ten little hands.

Rotiveo sprang to Roomba (hacked years before)
And away they went, after cleaning the floor
But I heard him exclaim, ‘ere he drove out of sight,
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!”

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